Tuesday, March 14, 2017

A wise man once said...

How do I disable the auto-correct function on my wife?

Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're CuTe.

My life is an open book. But it's very poorly written and I die in the end.

When you want to marry a beautiful, a smart and a rich woman – marry three times.

A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions which your wife asks for nothing.

Only after getting married you realise that those husband-wife jokes were not just jokes.

I have the body of a 25-year-old supermodel, but it takes up too much space in my freezer.