Thursday, October 19, 2017

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Monday, October 16, 2017

Friday, October 13, 2017

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Monday, October 9, 2017


Five Amazing Jobs

The Doctor
Who can tell a woman to 'take off all her clothes'.

The Dentist
Who can tell her to 'open wide'.

The Milkman
Who can ask her, "Do you want it in the front or the back?"

The Hairdresser
Who can ask her, "Do you want it teased or blown?"

The Interior Designer
Who can tell her, "Once it's inside, you'll love it!"

Four Amazing Names

There were four friends - Somebody, Nobody, Mad and Brain.

One day, Somebody killed Nobody. That time Brain was in toilet and Mad was the one who called 911.

"It's 911, what's the matter?"

"Emergency! Somebody killed Nobody!"

"Are you mad?"

"Yes, that's right!"

"Don't you have brain?"

"Brain is in the toilet."

An Amazing Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a man asked a girl, "Will you marry me?"

The girl said, "NO!"

So the man went fishing, hunting, and farted whenever he wanted.

He lived happily ever after.

-- The End --

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Trust me

Trust me, this cures constipation

Trust me, it will fly

Trust me, they were once fish

Trust me, they are friendly

Trust me, the dog did this on purpose

Trust me, she is available

Trust me, I didn't do it, meow.

Friday, October 6, 2017

Kinda busy right now...

Thank you for watching

A wise man once said...

There were computers in Biblical times. Eve had an Apple.

I just organized some plastic surgery for my wife. I cut up all her credit cards.

Young men want to be faithful, and are not. Old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

There are 70 ways to keep a woman happy.
One is to take her shopping.
The rest is 69.

You can get anything you want at Audrey's Cafe, except Audrey.

A lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth.

A babysitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Please define

Define 'top of the hill'

Define 'cartoon watching me'

Define 'so near yet so far'

Define 'dead hilarious shark'

Define 'falling in kissing'

Define 'my dog is unique'

Define 'I love Asian chicks'