Sunday, October 2, 2016

A wise man once said...

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby.

The joggers who drink coffee before they jog can run a lot faster, especially if they got the coffee at Starbucks because then their pockets were a lot lighter.

I went to a doctor, but all he did was suck blood from my neck... don't go see Dr. Acula.

My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ.

A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt:
Short enough to arouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.