Monday, September 26, 2016

The Announcements

"As you exit the plane, make sure to take all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses."

"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments." 

"Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

"Please make sure to take all of you belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have."